bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
