Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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