A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
So much puke
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"