I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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