He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
