Texts From Last Night

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  (818): View more from California

  Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.

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  (818): Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs. http://tfl.nu/c051
  Replies (100) Good night (3077) Bad night (817)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"

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  (856): i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty" http://tfl.nu/8yrq
  Replies (45) Good night (4333) Bad night (1256)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.

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  (781): I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house. http://tfl.nu/8emi
  Replies (13) Good night (5719) Bad night (1413)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good

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  (413): well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good http://tfl.nu/4dfc
  Replies (17) Good night (3617) Bad night (1816)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.

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  (773): he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex. http://tfl.nu/ci3t
  Replies (23) Good night (4654) Bad night (1002)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid

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  (814): its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid http://tfl.nu/99tk
  Replies (3) Good night (4600) Bad night (645)
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  (530): View more from California

  She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.

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  (530): She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth. http://tfl.nu/q63e
  Replies (10) Good night (873) Bad night (3522)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.

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  (512): I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed. http://tfl.nu/z4ve
  Replies (17) Good night (4261) Bad night (1838)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.

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  (902): you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken. http://tfl.nu/um57
  Replies (1) Good night (1024) Bad night (2629)
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  (+31): View more from The Netherlands

  The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'

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  (+31): The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?' http://tfl.nu/vspz
  Replies (6) Good night (2672) Bad night (752)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  Are we hungover?

  (713): View more from Texas

  I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.

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  (254): Are we hungover? (713): I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it. http://tfl.nu/8xx2
  Replies (5) Good night (1964) Bad night (630)
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  (914): View more from New York

  2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.

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  (914): 2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay. http://tfl.nu/1m5k
  Replies (26) Good night (1695) Bad night (727)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.

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  (309): I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne. http://tfl.nu/l6oj
  Replies (2) Good night (277) Bad night (224)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.

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  (306): no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag. http://tfl.nu/bx17
  Replies (0) Good night (524) Bad night (170)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.

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  (406): My vagina needs her own mother sometimes. http://tfl.nu/l820
  Replies (1) Good night (307) Bad night (190)

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