get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
