I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
