You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
