So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
