you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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