so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
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