Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
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