But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
