It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
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