3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
He did a backflip because drugs
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