It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
you made out with another girl for some wings
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
