Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
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this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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