Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
