Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
