i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
nutella sex= disaster
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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