But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
