I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize