I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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