Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
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