OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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