we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
he thought i was a dude.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Randomize