i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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