I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
