So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
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