butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
