im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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