oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your cock deserves a montage
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
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