Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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