so let's talk penis.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
