It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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