no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
