Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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