dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
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