you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
