I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
