You just made me feel so damn special
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize
