I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
