roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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