Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
