Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
