I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize