we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize