She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Randomize
