Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
