capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
